I know how does it feel when you come to know things are not going the way it should be going. You had seen her/him suffering from pain. You had seen him/her dying every moment of her/his life. You always wanted to help her/him but she/he always denied you to do that. Have you ever imagined why? Maybe she/he might not wanted you to suffer in the same pain she/he was going through. I know you feel the uttermost pain of not doing anything to help and heal her/him. But do you know what is the best thing you can do at the moment?
It’s pretty sure you’re thinking I’m suffering from some breakup or something. Right? Most of my friends and readers felt the same when they heard I’m going to write about How to move on after a breakup, their first message was in an astonished manner.
Haha! Well, it’s not the case here. I’m doing well with my life. I just got passed with good grades last night.😂 And as you’ve read my last post, in which I’ve vented out my frustration over this universal question “Do You Have A Girlfriend?”
Related- Do You Have A Girlfriend?
It’s been a long time I’m seeing most of my friends and readers who are not doing well in their life. And what’s the reason behind that? Well, it’s quite simple they’re mentally depressed. They are not able to think anything because they just broke up with their girlfriend/boyfriend.
But my question is, how long does it take to move on after a breakup?
A decade? An year? A month? A day?but what if I say you can move on right from a moment? This moment.
Don’t believe me? Let me explain you how…
Okay, so it may be your first relationship or may be second or third but you’re thinking in your mind that it was your true love for life. Right? That girl was the charming girl of your life. I can completely understand what you must be going through at this moment. I can relate it’s not simple to forget someone whom you thought be your world forever.
You’re crying for that someone on certain nights, wishing you might find her/him next to you soon. If you’re heartbroken I’d love to give you a free advice – Never ever get into/ back into a relationship with that person who has badly cheated on you and intentionally or unintentionally broken your heart and trust.
No offence, but think about it- If that person had not valued you when you were in her/his life and completely took you for granted, avoid your phone calls, lied to you for thousand times, there’s definitely every possibility that if you get back to her/his life, she/he wouldn’t think twice about doing anything similar to that.
In every relationship, two people share a mental and physical relationship with each other. The love which was once shared between the two is, somehow, lost now and which definitely would take some time to recover. But before that, you’ll have to be prepared mentally.
The tragic of this relationship status is on one day you’ll be thanking God that she/he went out of your life and think how can I ever fall for someone who hurt me this much and think Itna haqq to Maine apne parents ko bhi Nahi diya kabhi, aayi badi muje hurt karne wali ( I didn’t even give any right to my parents to hurt me, and she tried to hurt me. Huh!) and on other days you’ll be like- No matter whatever she/he did I need to give it one more chance. Haha! It happens right?;)
Does crying makes you less of a man?
Man! Here’s your weakness. Sympathy is not at all allowed in case of being cheated. You’ll have to be strong. You’ll have to be mentally prepared yourself for that person. You should not enter her/him inside your mind’s territory. She/he has lost that right now.
And of course! If you’ll ask me, I’m a guy and I’m crying over such things. Does that make me less of a man?
No. Of course not. Crying for things that actually meant a lot to you don’t make you any less of a man.
When someone cries so hard that it hurts their throat, it is out of frustration or knowing that no matter what you can do or attempt to do can change the situation. When you feel like you need to cry, when you want to just get it out, relieve some of the pressure from the inside – that is true pain. Because no matter how hard you try or how bad you want to, you can’t. That pain just stays in place. Then, if you are lucky, one small tear may escape from those eyes that water constantly. That one tear, that tiny, salty, droplet of moisture is a means of escape. Although it’s just a small tear, it is the heaviest thing in the world. And it doesn’t do a damn thing to fix anything.
After all, we all are social creatures. We all are Human beings. We only go through certain turmoils from time to time and hence there’s no harm in letting your emotions out.
In fact, I’d say if you want to cry, cry for her, cry hard for 2-3 days. Cry as much as you want but make one thing very clear that she’s not going to be the part of your life. Let her/him live in the past. You have finally moved on from her. You have moved on in life.
Don’t be ashamed to weep; ’tis right to grieve. Tears are only water, and flowers, trees, and fruit cannot grow without water. But there must be sunlight also. A wounded heart will heal in time, and when it does, the memory and love of our lost ones is sealed inside to comfort us.
It is a high time that you need to forget and forgive yourself. You just need to get out of it.
Don’t cry over the things which aren’t in your control
Don’t cry over the people who doesn’t love you back
Don’t cry over people who doesn’t value you
Don’t cry over the feelings which lead you nowhere
“Don’t cry over your past, it’s gone. Gone far away!”
All I want you to do is thank your past for whatever it has given you, and move on!
Perks of Love
You know, what is the best thing about love? It is something when you can do something for someone who can never ever repay you. And that’s what I call the power of love.
It would come out with passion, a passion for doing anything for that person, still not letting them know that what you’ve done.
It takes hell lot of town to realise that. Yet, you got a life to analyse that. You can’t just make up your mind if someone hurt you in the first place. Maybe she/he would not have been worth of your love. Maybe you deserve someone who can do thousand times more on what you do. You got to change your views. You got to change your perspective now to look at the beauty of the world. The beauty of Love.
“You’ve seen nothing in life, still, you’re refusing to look at it.”
So I’ve tried to make you move on in life. But we, as human beings, need something to be with us. I tried to compose this little verse for you to work for you as your affirmation.
Things you should do instead
Set your priorities in life.
Work on your own self. Try to overcome your fears.
Try to improve yourself each day so that when you look at yourself in the mirror you’ll see the better you. A person who’s better than yesterday.
What if she/he comes back?
If one fine day, you wake up and read her/his message. If she/he at some point of time period realises your value, how much you had cared for her/him, the other person is going to make efforts to come back, just because she/he is now addicted to your love. A love which she/he has taken for granted once. But now it’s completely up to you to decide what to do.
“An EX should stay an EX.
They’re the EXample of false love and
EXplanation for why you should deserve better.”
But as I’ve already explained why you should not to give any second chance. Again, I’d recommend you to not entertain this person in your life again.
You’ll feel like texting her even when your friends say no to about that. You’ll text her/him and she/he’ll be toying with you again. You’ll seek for reasons hut you’ll get nothing than her ignorance.
Try to indulge yourself in things which you like, get out with your friends, share your experiences and it’ll help lower the pain.
Don’t make yourself too demoralised just because of that person who’s no longer in your life. Instead, think about all those people who’ve provided you the unconditional love which you always wanted.
You just need to think I’m moving on in life now. No more waiting, no more hurt. You don’t know pain until you are staring at the mirror with tears streaming down your face, begging yourself to just hold on and be strong.
Now, I feel myself changing.
Changing, in a positive way.
I don’t laugh the way I used to laugh before.
I don’t smile the way I used to smile before.
I don’t trust people, the way I used to trust them.
I don’t talk to people, the way I used to talk to them.
I am just too tired and mentally exhausted. Though, I’m improving. I’m better.
You see how the cycle goes. All you have to do is sit back, take out those memories and throw them in dustbin. Those memories are not worth not. As Krishna says it in Bhagwat Gita – If you can’t help yourself, nobody can help you.
Hence, try to be your own help. Be motivated. Don’t let anyone harm you.
All the best. Have a happy and blessed life ahead.:D
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