It’s been quite a while that I’m being asked when will I marry? And most importantly if I have someone with whom I want to be forever. Of course, I can’t deny the fact this is the age where most of our friends are getting married, or have already married. A few ones we know may also have a kid(s).
But this makes me ask a question to no one but myself. If I ever have to marry someone, is this a set of people who would decide when should I do or it should be me who would take this decision?
Now again, here comes the two answers:
If they’re not the ones who can choose when and with whom I want to get married, then who will?
And if it’s me who’s to decide with whom I want to spend my entire life then who is it going to be?
Is sex what I am looking for? Regular sex that can make a man satisfied? But till how long? Would it not too less to think?
So what more can one look for? Love? Well, there’s a difference between love and sympathy. One has to choose what’s it.
Love cannot just be between a woman and man, but it’s everywhere if we see it. I love doing my job, I love hanging out with my set of people, I love partying and roaming around. But leaving everything and considering such “intense love” With a woman would suppress one’s real self after a while. Would it not?
What if a woman asks a man to leave everything that he loves because she doesn’t want to share her part of love for her man with anyone. Will that not kill your inner self?
All of the above things and more have been running in my head for a long time. Not only because I’ve turned 26 and I have to make a decision, but I’m putting myself in the shoes of others for how they decide when it’s their time to choose someone.
And finally, after having introspection with myself on a deeper level I’ve come up with only 2 reasons a man attend to women- Love and Sex.
Believe it or not but other than that no man thinks beyond this in the initial stage. A reproductive organ that will give a new generation to the man’s family.
But what differs and I believe there is- a man cannot/do not marry a woman for either of the things. Yes, he doesn’t. I would not.
A man marries for stability.
A man can be with a woman for years and have innumerable times of sex but would not marry her in the end.
Same way, it doesn’t require a man to marry a girl of his dream just because he loves her. I may love Deepika Padukone, but to think about marrying her is stupidity. Not because I come in the category of a common working man, but I may not know what that personality is all about. But that wouldn’t lessen my love, because that’s there from distance. And this goes with any man loving a girl just like him, but would not/can not marry her.
Now if I consider myself in the shoes when I’m asked by my family to take a call, I always say, the moment I get a girl who I think, would bring stability in my wild thoughts, unnatural acts, and in my life, I’ll marry her the next day.
Men are truly inventive when they about getting married. I have never seen a man getting excited for the fancy dress he’s going to put up on his marriage day, or the dance he’s going to perform, or the photos and all the fun things a woman thinks about all the time.
Women need that. Men don’t. Women are like coconut, absolutely strong from outside but as gentle as a flower. A man can think his woman would make a home for her, a place where the peace comes out naturally, where all the sorrow would vanish.
After all, women can receive, accept, and reproduce. The biggest power in the world. You give her ingredients, she’ll prepare a mean, you give her salary, she’ll plan the future, you give her attention, she’ll make you her life, you give her money, she gives you peace, you give her a bed, she’ll give you comfort, you give her penetration, she’ll give her real self, you ask her to open up, she’ll cry and become stronger. And most importantly, you hurt her by mistake, you’ll be the only person who’d feel worst as your nightmare, and all the men know this.
This is the reason a man can claim to be with a woman for years unhappily, and meet an imperfectly perfect woman and get married to make your life easy and give you stability.
I’d wait until the moment I realise, that I cannot afford to lose such heart. I’ll marry that day, that moment itself.
And lastly, sex can be counted in pleasure, love can be counted in endearment, but stability always makes you respect your woman.
I want to become that man to deserve such a woman to get married, not only for sex, or love but for stability.
Copyright ©️ 2015-2021 by SumitOfficial
All Rights Reserved.
I enjoyed reading your reflections on marriage, Sumit. I think one other reason to marry is for companionship. I’ve found that as we get older and friends and family pass on to the next world, or move away, having that one person there to spend your days with is really important. Just one other aspect to consider ❤
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Such a relevant and contemporary topic to write about, Sir. Thank God someone addressed this. 😛 I got to understand a man’s perspective about marriage as well. In my opinion, one should only marry when he/she is mentally and emotionally ready for it. Jumping into it having no clue what lies ahead mostly leads to disasters!
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Great to see you back sir.
Missed all of your poems, all your creations……
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You may love someone but may not feel stable with them. I think you are perfectly right. Stability is right. Love and stability will make the most sought combination for a marriage. 26 is scary
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That’s right. Loving someone may not give you the comfort to be with them.
We need someone that calms our storm down when we’re falling apart.
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Well said!
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Ohh ! Well I think you should open a love school amazing describe your thought
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