When there are two lovers who tend to fall for each other, they try to discover each other individually, and help the other one to grow with the love. They uplift each other. When there are two people who are in love exchange marital vows, they make promises to support one another in sickness and health.
A mother makes no such promise when she gives a birth to her child. She believes in loving her child like anything, a mother in any form is a blessing by the God. And she is the only lady in a child’s life who performs all the roles, from being a protector, caretaker, a best friend, love guru and so much more than which could be counted. Even after she does everything for us, I guess, most of the time we are not really grateful to her.
So here I am writing a few things I always observed and noticed about my Mum ever since I was a little kid, and today (May 7, 2016) as every year, is her birthday as well which suffice my love and a birthday gift for her.
I feel incredibly grateful to have you as my mentor cum a great friend cum the best mother in the world. Your presence, your guidance, your blessings and what not has always been a huge motivation for me. There are so many instances when I get in trouble today, all I can think of is the way you always have taught me to think and solve. You never actually spoon fed me in life, rather you had put everything in front of me and guided me how to hold and pick that spoon and feed myself, by myself. You were there to hold me if I fail, but first you let me try. Your love has always been unconditionally beautiful for me. You never really showed me for how much you love me, but always proved me when it is required. You actually taught me what unconditional love is all about, you do not always need to brag about loving someone, you do. You love, even if nobody can see, feel, or recognise, but silently you love. That’s the biggest form of love I’ve learnt from you.
Every time I think of you so many different memories come to mind—memories that will live in my head and heart for a lifetime.
You Still Are…
The things I remember MOST about you: You were/are ALWAYS there for me no matter what the circumstances are, no matter how foul my mood, no matter what time of day or night. You have shown me complete acceptance, love, and understanding. All those years that I lived far away I never felt far from you because I knew you were there rooting for me and loving me from a distance. And you still are….
If I needed you, you always made time for me, you have always protected me from everyone who tried to hurt me ever since I was a little kid. I remember being the youngest one in the entire family and nobody would let me play cricket or any other sport saying I am too young to hold a bat, how fiercely you’d fight with all the kids who’d not let me play, you’d be with me against tens of those kids. You might not remember but I felt the most powerful that time in the world. The reason was you were beside me.
I always knew you are supporting and patting my back from behind. You have no idea how comforting that has been in my life. At times, I miss your presence in my life when a few situations fall into my way and all I could do is to remember you, your teachings for a lifetime that you have given me. Things are not always pleasant to me (sometimes, it gets worst), although I could manage to be happy and to make everyone happy around me. They need to be happy after all you’ve taught me to make this bad world a beautiful world with my little efforts. With the power of my pen, my love. I hope I’m doing justice to your learnings mum.
Your Way of Making Everyone Eat
I still remember how the aroma of your delicious food used to attract everyone in the house and in our society. How people were craving to have food cooked by you, and oh my God! I still remember the wide smile on your face while feeding everyone. Your soul was as perfect as any newborn baby’s heart. Feeding people has always satisfied your soul, Mum. You love to share what you had no matter how little it was. That was the first time I could able to understand the meaning of unconditional love again. You don’t always need money to be rich, you need a heart. We had no money, but we had you, and we were so rich.
It always takes 2 minutes for you to impress anybody with your sweet talks. You were everyone’s favourite, You still are.
Sorry, I can’t stop tears gushing down my cheeks while writing this letter to you. Mum, I really miss you at times. I never utter a single word to anyone when I miss you. All I do is looking up there in the sky and feel your presence in my heart. There are times when I am all alone, I’m not afraid of being alone, it’s just that the feelings which made me weak. It is horrible. But Mum, you don’t need to worry about me now, I’m matured enough. I’ve learnt to control my emotions now. I’ve learnt to be detached from people and love them as they are. Unconditionally. Just like you do.
But still, I can’t love anyone in my life, the way I loved you, nobody can ever replace you, Mum. I still remember I did not let you leave me for a single second when I was little. Sticking to your Pallu to everywhere you’d go. I remember it used to piss you off for I had never given you your space, I always wanted to fit in there. How you were the most incredible person in my life. You still are…
(See, how organised you are in your childhood picture, even when you were this young)
How I used to stick to you to spend my entire life. I also remember something in bits and pieces, I used to wrap my little forearm around your neck while sleeping just to ensure that you’re with me, you don’t leave me ever. And hence, I’ve got a tattoo for you when I was 15, and I can still feel the presence of you around my forearm.
(9 Years ago I had tattooed “Love U Mom”, on my arm to express the love for you mum)
That was my way of loving you. This is how I loved you. It was pure, it was white. It was the most beautiful feelings for me at that time because you were there for me. Always. I could sacrifice all the relations of my life just for you Mum. You were that much precious for me. You still are...
Mum, I’m grateful to you for uncountable reasons and here are some of them which I cherish in my life today:
You taught me how to love in an unconditional way and have an open heart
I have seen further evidence of this unconditional love in the way that you show such love, patience, and commitment with Dad.
As a kid, I remember snuggling up to you on the couch and how much I loved to be cuddled by you. All the time. I remember years later that you too loved me with same craziness as I loved you Mum and that was so surprising to me. It makes me happy today.
You taught me that you can rise above your circumstances
You had to do those small works so that you can provide me all the facilities which I needed that time. You wanted me to study in English medium. Since we did not have enough money to get my admission in the convent school. You wanted me to study in English medium, you wanted me to be the ocean of knowledge. You wanted me to speak fluent English. Mum, with all your blessings I’m living all these things, your dreams and beyond it. Hopefully, I’m living all your dreams. Your dreams are mine now. I hope you’re happy seeing me the way you always wanted me to be. Official. Professional. SumitOfficial.
You taught me to give my very best at everything I do
When I used to come to you with hard decisions in my life and feel confused about what to do, you always listen to all of the alternatives, hear my concerns, and then ask the key question “What do you think you should do?” before offering guidance or advice.
You had never imposed your decisions, opinions, suggestions on my shoulder. Instead, you always made me capable of taking my own decisions. To live an independent life. And that’s the sign of a great parent, a mentor, and a leader.
You taught me how to think for myself
I think you may have also inadvertently taught me how to be perfect in whatever I do.
Throughout my life, you recognized what I needed. You always knew that I had a strong mind of my own and a longing for adventure. I appreciate the things you let me do, like playing with me, allowing me the independence to pal around the neighborhood with all the girls and boys—playing sports, traveling to places (and paying for it!).
You supported me on all of my adventures and various jobs. Never sharing with me the worries that I KNOW you had (I totally get it now). You saw who I was, and respected me enough to let me live my own life.
You taught me how to be strong and independent
I see now that I wouldn’t have been able to be as adventurous if it weren’t for the unyielding support that I felt from you and Dad. Thank you isn’t enough.
I remember a mantra that you would say over and over and over again in my childhood and into my adulthood… “anything and everything is possible if you set your mind to it” and YOU lived this…you lived this in the way that you have never given up on your health. You lived this in the way that you turned out to be an amazing human being despite a very difficult upbringing. You lived this in the way that you have stayed committed through the ups and down of your marriage and set an amazing example for the rest of us. You lived this in the way that you encouraged me every single time I wanted to follow a new dream. You believed in me…
You taught me how to dream
Thank you Mumma, for showing me what love, commitment, and family is all about. Thank you for being so wonderful to me all the time. Today, I am everything you wanted me to be. As I mentioned, we had no money to get my enrollment into the convent school, but still you made me go to the semi-government school. I made myself proud by getting the admission into an English medium school. You wanted me to study and be fluent in everything people admire, I worked on myself and by the age of 21 I post graduated myself with an MBA degree. Even after earning lakhs of rupees here, I still think of everything you have dreamt of me to become, and I’m on my way to reach there soon, Mum. I’m going to make you a proud mother of her loving child.
I’m happy to tell you that I have a few women in my life who loves me a lot and are always there for me and I can count those names on my fingers, Divyani, Keyuri, Manpreet Madam, and Shamira Didi. They’re not just rare women, but blessings in my life.
And lastly, a few words to end with
Mum, you know what I am surrounded with the best people in the world. I get the same love from everyone, they know me, they respect me and my work. Most of the time whenever someone who meets me or reads my blog, appreciate me for who I am, they always thank you for always being a great Mum in the world to to cherish me this way. Being a gentleman is only possible when you are born in the hands of a Queen. She teaches you to conquer the world. It always reminds me of you. I want to tell each and every man/woman who thinks or claims that I respect women a lot because it is you who made me do this, mum. It’s always humanity before any gender. It is your upbringing which makes me respect humanity. It’s your blessings which made me a man of substance. I want to thank you for that too. A thank you for everything. A thank you for this lifetime.
These are truly one of the BEST gifts you have given me, Mum. As I’ve said above, a thank you is not enough for you. Still, all I can say is I love you, Mum. And happy birthday to you.
Your little grown up child,
(I could manage to find a picture with my mum and brother. Although, it’s very old picture of us.)
(This letter was originally written on May 7, 2016 and there are some changes made by rewriting it.)
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